Reflections of The Innocent
by Kitty-Cat1286
Summary: Lupin reflects on a woman he once knew. How he felt . How it ended. Please R/r.


Reflections of The Innocent.  
  
  
~I see a face, that face is mine  
The mirror marks the changing time  
Her face I'll never see again  
And mine will never be the same  
That face was fine only yesterday  
My problems seemed so far away ~  
  
  
Lupin looked into the mirror. He saw himself in his common, drab  
sable robes. He saw his dark mahogany hair and that sorrowful  
look in his eyes. He touched the lines under his eyes from  
insufficiency of sleep. Everything is so ordinary. And yet, he saw  
more. Something much, much more than that. He saw memories.  
Memories of sunny days. Memories of his past. Memories  
of............her. He remembered how she looked, her long light  
reddish-brown hair, yellow-green eyes, and delicate figure. He  
remembered how it felt to embrace her, to caress her, to kiss  
her. He could see the day they met. He sat down in a chair next  
to the mirror and sighed. Thinking.  
  
~ Reflections I see of myself  
As in sickness, as in health  
As she left as for worse  
No chance to re-rehearse ~  
  
It was a thunderstorm and he had taken shelter on someone's  
porch. He huddled down in a corner, pulling his robes around  
him. "So cold..." He thought. The door opened and a woman  
stepped out. The light from the house shone out unto the street.  
She looked around the porch. Her gaze stopped on him in the  
corner. She cocked her head to the side. She seemed to think  
for a moment and went inside. She returned shortly with a towel.  
She took 2 steps toward him and held out the towel. "It's okay,"  
She said, "I won't hurt you." She smiled as he took the towel and  
wrapped it around himself. He started shivering. "Come inside  
and dry off." She took his hand and helped him up, "You can  
even eat with us and stay the night. We have an extra room and  
I'm sure Daddy won't mind." He allowed himself to be lead into  
the house, shutting the door behind him. "I-I'm....My name is R-  
Remus Lupin." He stuttered. She laughed and took him into a  
large room with a fire going. She lead him to the stone ledge  
infront of the fireplace. He watched as sparks flew into the grid  
and slowly smoldered out. "Sit here and dry off. I'll bring some  
tea and crackers. Okay?" He nodded, "Good! I'll be right back."  
She left the room. The man sitting in a chair opposite him folded  
his paper unto his lap. He stared at him a moment and pulled a  
pipe from his pocket and lit it. "So, let me guess. You took  
shelter on our porch, my daughter found you, felt compassion  
for you, decided to invite you in, feed you, let you stay a night  
or two hoping I wouldn't mind. Correct?" Remus nodded. The  
man laughed. He was a strongly built man with a mustache and  
beard. "By the way, I'm Edgar Allen." He said. Just then, the  
woman stepped back into the room carrying a tray with a teapot,  
three teacups, and a plate of crackers. "I'm back. Hope I didn't  
keep you waiting too long. " She walked over and set the tray  
next to him. "Go ahead, take all you like." She smiled at him. He  
reached for a cracker and ate it slowly. looking around. He  
finally got a good chance to look at her. She had light brown  
hair and green eyes. She was dressed in a light blue dress with  
a plain white apron tied around her slender waist. She looked  
very pretty. She smiled as he looked at her. She suddenly  
looked shocked. "I almost forgot! My name's Lydia Rebecca  
Allen. I'm 14 and go to Beauxbatons. My mother's name was  
Lenore but died when I was 2, my birthday is June 21. How old  
are you and where do you go?" She asked. "I'm 15 and I go to  
Hogwarts. I ran away from home because I found my dad  
cheating on my mum. What town am I in anyway?" He said.  
"You're in Edinburgh in Scotland. Where did you think you  
were?" She asked. "Edinburgh!?!? I'm in Edinburgh! I walked  
here from London!" He exclaimed. She poured him a cup of tea  
and touched his shoulder. "Calm down. Here." He shook his  
head. "No. I've been walking for three weeks. If I want to make it  
to Hogwarts by summer at the least, I better start walking now."  
He stood up. "Don't worry. You can stay here. Term starts in  
about 2 weeks anyway. You can stay with us and when we go  
shopping in Diagon Alley, we can get you new robes and books  
and you can stay there until it's time to leave. Okay? You do  
know you're way to the Hogwarts Express from there, don't  
you?" The man asked. He nodded. Lydia stood up. She smiled  
politely. "Follow me. I'll show you to your room."  
  
~ Try to forget, try not to see  
Who is that face looking at me?  
Reflections of yesterday  
If only I could make you stay ~  
  
Suddenly there was a knock at the door. "Remus? Is something  
the matter? We missed you at supper." The door opened and  
Professor McGonagall stepped in. Lupin jumped slightly at the  
voice. "No. Nothing's wrong, Minerva. I'm fine." He said,  
absentmindedly. "Well, okay. If you say so." She said  
suspiciously and left, leaving the door slightly open. Remus  
sighed and looked back into the mirror. Something was wrong.  
Terribly wrong. Something he could never tell anyone. Something  
that he didn't even want to know himself.  
  
~ One day past is like a year  
She wouldn't say what made her leave  
I didn't think she'd ever go  
And why she did I'll never know  
I wish I could return and see  
But now it's just a memory ~  
  
Then he remembered the last time he saw her. She was leaving  
for somewhere.   
It was summer and he had gone to visit her but when he got  
there, she was packing her things. "Where are you going?" He  
asked, stepping into her room. She looked at him. He handed  
her the flowers from behind his back. "They're for you, Lydia."  
He said, smiling. But she didn't. For a split second, he could  
see tears in her eyes. He could see the pain and anger staring  
back at him. "Somewhere far away from here." She said,  
looking away. She set the flowers down on her bed-side table.  
He looked at her, puzzled. "Where is 'somewhere?' Is it very  
far? Can I come to see you?" He asked. " 'Somewhere' is VERY  
far away from her. No, you can't come and see me." She  
snapped. He stepped back. " Where I'm going is far away.  
Where I'm going I'll be appreciated and loved. I'll be praised as  
what I really am." She sighed. "I thought you were loved and  
happy here. Where you are. Why do you have to go?" He  
questioned. "I have to go. Do you really want to know, Remus?"  
He nodded. "all right, fine. I am going to join Voldemort." She  
said. He knew that name. Voldemort was famous. Or nearly  
famous. "Y-you mean that weird kid with the black hair that  
always went around saying 'I am Lord Voldemort! Fear me!' and  
flashing people? Um, Thomas Riddle?" He asked. She laughed  
slightly. "Yes. But do you think they'll take a scrawny, ugly, 15  
year-old like myself?" She stopped packing and looked at him.  
He went over and wrapped his arms around her, pulling her  
close. "Of course. You can do anything if you set your mind to  
it." He said. "But I DID plan on marrying you and raising a family  
here. Just for old times, let's give it a go." He laid her unto her  
bed and turned off the lamp, kissing her passionately.  
  
~Reflections of yesterday  
I see a face, that face is mine  
The mirror marks the changing time  
Her face I'll never see again  
And mine will never be the same  
Reflections of yesterday ~  
  
Lupin still sat in his chair. Sitting. Thinking. Waiting. Waiting for  
something. Anything to stop him from remembering her. He knew  
he was the one that caused her to go to Voldemort. He was the  
one who blamed himself for her killing herself. Everyone else  
blamed him for it so why shouldn't he? Never again would he  
hear her beautiful voice. Never again would he hold her slender  
figure in his arms until they both fell asleep. Never again would  
he hear her sing to him that beautiful song she always sang.  
Lupin stood and walked to the window. 'Good. Still daylight left.'  
He thought, 'I may make it there with just enough time.' He turned  
from the window and rushed out the door. He hurried quickly past  
students, ghosts, and mysteriously 'floating' water balloons.   
Finally, he made it to the grounds. He slowed to catch his breath  
at the edge of the Forbidden Forest. He knew it was unsafe, but  
he had to go in. He took a deep breath and stepped inside. He  
felt the magic bind him. He knew he couldn't hold his breath for  
long. He strained against it, twisting until he broke loose. He ran past it all, sidestepping trees, jumping streams and sliding under the occasional fallen tree. He lost his breath just as he stepped into a clearing. He fell to his knees, pulling in rapid, rough breaths.  
He looked up to where the setting sun still shone upon a small ebony headstone with golden words. He arose to his feet and  
walked to it. He knelt and stared at the solitary, wilted, crimson rose still there after 19 years. He read the golden words.  
  
Here lies the radiant   
  
Lydia Rebecca Allen   
  
Aged 17  
  
At the hand of Fate she bravely stood   
And  
At the hand of Fate she bravely loved  
And  
At the hand of Fate she bravely fought  
And  
At the hand of Fate she bravely died  
  
A sole silver tear fell upon her grave that day. And a new man  
arose from it. As he walked away from the sepulcher in the  
setting sunlight, he could hear her heavenly voice sing. And for  
the first, and last, time from that day to the day he, himself,  
passed away to be with and embrace her in Elysian fields, he  
sang with her the song.  
  
Somewhere out there  
Beneath the pale moonlight  
Someone's thinking of me  
And loving me tonight  
  
Somewhere out there  
Someone's saying a prayer  
That we'll find one another  
In that big somewhere out there  
  
And even though I know  
How very far apart we are  
It helps to think we might be wishing  
On the same bright star  
  
And when the night wind  
Starts to sing a lonesome lullaby  
It helps to think we're sleeping  
Underneath the same big sky  
  
Somewhere out there  
If love can see us through  
Then we'll be together  
Somewhere out there  
Out where dreams come true  
  
And even though I know  
How very far apart we are  
It helps to think we might be wishing  
On the same bright star  
  
And when the night wind  
Starts to sing a lonesome lullaby  
It helps to think we're sleeping  
Underneath the same big sky  
  
Somewhere out there  
If love can see us through  
Then we'll be together  
Somewhere out there  
Out where dreams come true...  
  
The End   
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~  
  
How was it? Did you hate it? Like it? Flames?  
Questions? Comments? Please review and tell me. All  
are ALWAYS accepted. Send them in!  
*Gothic_Paper_Dollie* 


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